I find myself at work avoiding certain people and places (including the front office where my office is located). In some conversations I feel like I am being talked AT not talked to. Some people go on and on about what I feel are menial things and it absolutely drains all of my energy. I find it rude to cut people off so I have a hard time ending conversations that have gone on too long. In some instances I start moving away or do my best to politely end the conversation. Sometimes, saying too much starts to distort the point and I leave the conversation with more questions than answers.
In terms of my leadership I guess this is two fold. First, I am having a hard time being "visible" when some people make me want to hide. I know that small talk is important to develop rapport and I really like talking to people. However, I want to be able to get work done and talk with a lot of different people throughout the day without having my time monopolized by a few individuals. Second, how can I be "heard" when I have difficulty "lecturing" people or demanding air time from more vocal people. Even when I was a teacher I never talked for more than 15 minutes at a time and saw myself more as a facilitator of learning allowing the students to work together, ask questions and move around the room. Doesn't the average person have a 7 minute attention span anyway?
Okay thanks for your insight as always. I hope you enjoyed a much needed vacation. I am slowly emerging from solitary confinement (not really, I spent time with family) and looking forward to a fresh start.
Patrice,
ReplyDeleteI don't know that I would consider myself an introvert, but I understand your desire to avoid certain people. When I became a department chair, my predecessor told me that one of the best pieces of advice she ever received was to "lead by walking." What she meant is that she made sure to stop by each teacher's room each day. She would begin her round about 7:45 and end about 8:15. Often times, she did little more than walk the three halls our department was spread across, and maybe stick her head in the door just to say good morning. Now, she did this most days, but not every day. When I became department chair, I followed suit. I can still picture those individuals that I really didn't want to speak to, but I made myself do it. I still find myself interaction with people I'd rather not interact with, but I still make myself do it.
I'm not sure if that helps...but I did find this article that might --> https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/self-promotion-introverts/201509/who-says-extroverts-make-better-leaders-part-2